Three Months

Dearest Belle,

You are three months old today! And ohmigoodness you are SUCH a cutie. Everywhere I take you, people stop in their tracks to look and tell me what a precious baby girl I have. You of course, put on a show-- batting those beautiful eye lashes and flashing that beautiful gummy smile. Daddy tells me almost every day how pretty you are... proceeded by how he dreads the day when boys start to take notice! But we've already had lots of conversations about how real beauty comes from the inside, so stay a sweetie! You have started "talking" quite a bit these days and making all sorts of delightful sounds. It's music to my ears!

You never really caught on to the whole nursing thing, so I'm pumping instead and you take a bottle. You eat about four ounces every three hours, though sometimes it takes a lot of effort for you to even eat that much! You will sleep from about 8pm- 7am, waking up twice to eat an ounce or two. We go back and forth on the swaddling. You don't particularly like it, but you are just way to wiggly to sleep otherwise!

This night you spent the night away from the both of us for the first (and second) time. You went to Grandma Linda's first when we had a NyQuil party. Then last week, you went up to Grammy's so Daddy and I could go, and actually listen, to Julie's choir concert. Getting a full nights sleep was fabulous, but I was anxious to get a super cute smile from my baby girl!

We always hear about how much you look like Jackson.

(all pictures taken on three-month "birthdays")

I am sure that there will come a day when you might want to deny him as your older brother (like when I remind you of the time that he was using your foot as barcode scanner to "check" out his books from the library-- he made it beep and everything!), but I'm not so sure you that you will be able to pull it off! You do have lots more hair and you are much cuter in pink! We love you so very, very much!!

Two Months

Belle is two months old today. Holy cow! She is just the sweetest little thing and very, very cute! 

Belle,
You are growing so fast! You've gotten more liberal with your smiles lately and are starting to coo and talk to us. It is the sweetest sound ever. You must be going through some sort of growth spurt because last week you just wanted to eat and eat. And now this week, you're just sleeping and sleeping! We have your doctor appointment later this week so we will be able to see just how much you've grown! It also means that you've gotta get some shots. I'm not looking forward to it... and if you knew what was coming, you probably wouldn't either! You have a good sleeping schedule and you're weaning yourself from nighttime feedings too, which is wonderful because Daddy and I would love getting back to a full nights sleep soon! I just love, love being your Mommy and Daddy loves to come home to see your pretty smile. You may be small, but I know you've got him wrapped around your finger (and your Grandma's and Papa's too!). Daddy said just the other day that he noticed more of your personality shining through and we both can't wait to know you better as you grow older-- just don't grow too fast!
Love, Mommy

Loose Ends

I've had intentions of blogging for the past several days with pictures and updates, but my desire to sleep during my free time has trumped getting on my computer. Here's a little bit of what's been going on:

Gram-Gram

Since sweet baby Belle was born, I have had a ton of people helping around the clock- my mom, mother-in-law, other family members, friends from church, friends from college... my front door has basically become a revolving door (which is totally okay by me!). This past week, my grandma (Jackson refers to her as Gram-Gram) was on "helper duty". She drove down on Monday and stayed until Friday. It was so, so nice to have her here!! She cooked her coveted noodles, baked oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, folded laundry, washed dishes. She went to my MOPS group with me and to church on Wednesday night. It was so nice having her as part of our everyday life for a whole week!

The weather was nice so we headed out for a walk on a nearby trail. See her trying to keep up with Jackson?

Another nice day, we headed to the park and she took Belle for a walk while I stayed with Jackson at the playground.

I think this was her favorite-- snuggling Belle and reading books to Jackson.

I hardly ever make it up to Trenton these days, so it was just so wonderful to get to spend a whole week with her! Plus, I got to take a few extra naps!

Derek's Graduation
In just 10 days, Belle and I will be flying to Georgia for Derek's graduation from AIT. I am so, so excited! I have been wanting to go all along, but Derek kept brushing it off as something he didn't really care about and didn't want to spend the money for me to go out there. I was doing my best to respect his wishes, but when he finally mentioned that he would like for us to be there, I practically jumped out of my seat!

My mother-in-law and I were going to fly out together, but the cost of the airline tickets more than doubled over-night and so now it's only me (and Belle). Seriously, on Thursday night- $250 a person covered flight, hotel, and car rental. On Friday morning, I paid $475 for flight, hotel, and car-- and that was using Priceline's feature of not selecting my flight times and just taking what they give me. It would have been $680 otherwise. Is that not unbelievable?!?!

But even that can't take away my excitement to go see him! I am so, so, so proud of him. And I'm pretty sure he's excited to show Belle off to some of his Army buddies too. Belle will be 3 1/2 weeks when I fly with her. Hopefully she'll still be the easiest baby ever and make it a super easy trip!

Chick-fil-a
I totally heart Chick-fil-a. The people there are always so kind and I may have a waffle-fry addiction. Plus, I'm a fan of styrofoam cups and Coke- so it's the perfect place! Yesterday on Gram-Gram's way out of town, we met up with my mom for lunch at the Chick-fil-a in Liberty. Let me share with you how awesome the people were yesterday.

First. When I was walking in I was carrying Jackson in one arm and the baby carrier in the other. One of the employees must have seen me from inside because she came outside to open the doors for us. She totally didn't have to do that.

Second. As people were oohing and aahing over Belle (because it happens everywhere we go!) another one of the workers stopped and gushed as well. She also pointed out that there we had four generations all together at our table- how cool! Mom mentioned how she would have liked to have gotten a picture the other day when we were together and I had my camera. Well, awesome Chick-fil-a girl comes back with the owner (I think) with camera in hand. He takes a picture with his camera and emails it right away! She (and he) totally didn't have to do that!

Third. Getting ready to leave, I packed up the kiddos and headed for the door. I had my Coke and the carrier in one hand and was holding Jackson's hand with the other. I was prepping myself for the mad dash that was about to take place as it was raining like crazy. Mr. Owner guy comes out behind the counter to open the door for us-- how nice! But, then he told us to wait... he went and got an umbrella and walked us out to the car! He stood there with the umbrella while I got both kids buckled in and I got in the driver's seat. He totally didn't have to do that!

Are you seeing the trend here?? No other fast food place would ever offer out service like that!! Granted, I would love to see a dollar menu pop up soon, but with service like that-- they can charge whatever they want for a chicken sandwich and we will go back!!

Bye Bye Blankie

Don't worry, Jackson... not YOUR blankie. That would be disastrous on so many levels! 

We're talking about Belle's bili-blanket!

Belle's already been to the doctor enough this week that they pull her charts as soon as we walk in the office- we don't even have to sign in. We've had to go back several times to get her bilirubin checked and we have another appointment next week. By Tuesday, her bilirubin levels had elevated to a point where she needed a little intervention. I am so glad we could use the blanket this time, as opposed to checking into the hospital with Jackson! It was pain in the tush, in all honesty, but it worked and we got the go ahead from the doctor to take her off the blanket today.

Yay for getting to wear the cute clothes that are overflowing in her closet again! (She had to be down to a diaper and swaddled with the blanket for the past several days, so all those clothes were just hanging there un-purposefully!)

Belle's one week old today!

Introducing Isabelle Marie

On Friday, February 18th our beautiful daughter Isabelle ("Belle") Marie was born. She arrived at 11:56 am at a healthy 6 pounds-11 ounces, 18 inches long, and a head full of hair! 

The Birth Story:
It was no secret that we had a pretty specific plan for how she was suppose to arrive in this world. She clearly has a mind of her own and decided to arrive ahead of schedule, but only by a few hours. I wasn't even induced, she came on her own! Everything worked out just fine and it was still a very joyful weekend!

Thursday night: 

6:00pm- Dinner at Texas Roadhouse with parents

8:00pm- Check into hospital 

9:00pm- Only dilated to 2cm, so they began the Cervidil, which isn't necessarily an induction medicine, but more so a medicine that allows your body to better absorb the induction drugs that will start the next morning.

Friday Morning

6:00am- get up and take a shower. Ate contraband banana (and everything turned out just fine!)

7:30am- dilated only 2cm, doctor breaks water, contractions start right away, holding off on induction medicine for time being. Text to Derek: It's just so weird with you not here. Like it's just not supposed to be this way. He replies: I'm on my way, baby. Just hang in there!

8:30am- Derek boards first plane. Epidural arrives not much later. 

9:00am- Already to dilated 5cm... Woah, slow down!! I haven't even started my induction meds! I decided to do my hair, mom painted my nails... total denial people. I was still hoping she'd make it to 3:30pm.

10:00am- Derek arrives in Atlanta and texts: You are making fast progress. Hope I make it. I reply: You'll make it.

10:30am- dilated 8cm. Noooo!! Nurse tells me to tell her if I start feeling pressure. Mom calls Dad to tell him to get to hospital NOW. Start giving last minute tutorials to Mom and Linda on how to use the cameras.

11:00am-dilated 9 cm, no that's definitely a 9.5cm. And that is definitely pressure I feel. Quick call to Dad: "WHERE ARE YOU!?...You're still 25 minutes away!?...Nurse, do I have 25 minutes?!" She replies that if I can hold it in, I can make it. I literally had to cross my legs and attempt to hold her back for just a little bit longer. If I wasn't going to have my husband, my dad just had to be there!

11:15am- call Derek. She's coming... NOW. Shed a few tears because I was so disappointed. Even though he wasn't there in person, I was talking to him on speaker phone for as long as possible. He was soooo encouraging. 

11:45am- Dad arrives as my hand holder. Nurse attempts a last dilation check, but can't because the baby's head is so low. Derek had to get off the phone so he could board the plane.

11:56am- Baby Isabelle arrives! Dad cuts the cord. Seriously, less than 10 minutes from the picture above and the picture below. Amazing.

12:00pm- Call Derek, goes straight to voicemail. Dang it. He's already on the plane. Leave a quick voicemail. Oh wait-- he's calling me back! I get to deliver the news of our baby girl to him while he is sitting on the tarmac. 

2:40pm- get text from Derek that he's landed in KC.

3:15pm- Derek arrives and gets to meet his baby girl. He just gazed at her for several minutes, just soaking in all the beauty.

It was so good to finally get to experience our baby girl together!

We had chosen a name several months ago, but we decided to keep it to ourselves until after she was born. As soon as it was announced that she was born, the requests for her name reveal was immediate and plentiful. I don't regret keeping that quiet until Derek arrived. It just wasn't right for me to introduce her to the world via facebook pictures and text messages before Daddy even got a chance to meet her himself.

And just an observation: when you keep the name to yourself, more people respond to the news of baby with, "what's her name?!" than, "How's the baby, how's mommy?" and in this case, people didn't even acknowledge the disappointment that it was to have her come before Derek even came home- instead, just texts, phone calls, and facebook messages to me, Derek, and other family regarding her name.

Jackson is adjusting well to his role as big brother. He loves to look at her, give her kisses, and the occasional high five.

Derek stayed until Monday morning. It was pure devastation to tell him bye and watch him walk out the front door. I literally emptied an entire Kleenex box of tissues that day. I'm doing better, but I really miss him so much. I've been so strong the entire separation, but I don't have much strength to hold myself together when I think or talk about him anymore. I gathered some laundry today and broke down into tears as I was putting his t-shirts and jeans into wash. Thank goodness he is coming home next month.

Belle is struggling with her bilirubin levels, but is otherwise perfectly healthy. She's struggling with nursing, but improving a little bit each day. In the mean time, I'm pumping and supplementing with bottles to keep her eating and gaining weight. I really did forget how much newborns really sleep. I feel like she's hardly any work right now!

38 weeks: ONE WEEK LEFT!

Yes, one week from today, we will be welcoming our little baby girl in the world! It is so surreal to even think about. And I've been so preoccupied with getting all of the baby things together that I've hardly even thought about actually getting to see Derek next week too. So, I have a new wave of excitement to keep me going!! 

I'm not sure if I even mentioned on here the details of Derek getting to come home. The plan looks like this: I am scheduled for an induction for next Friday, February 18th. I will go in on Thursday night. Derek plane arrives in KC at 2:30pm and we are hoping he makes it to the hospital around 3:30ish. Our doctor is super on board with doing our best to plan the timing so that I'm ready enough when he arrives to just push her out, but yet not getting too far along that we end up having her before Derek arrives. I think God is laughing at our attempt to plan one of life's biggest unpredictablies. Oh well. It's what we are shooting for, but he is coming home regardless... even if it's a few hours (days) after she's born. Still better than nothing.

*How far along?: 38 weeks

*How big is your baby?: Approx. 6.8 pounds

*Total weight gain?: 13 pounds

*Sex: Girl

*Maternity clothes: I've actually started packing up summer items and other things that I don't plan on wearing in the next week.

*Stretch marks: Unfortunately yes

*Movement: All. of. the. time.

*Sleep: Sleep is good, but between getting up to pee a KAZILLION times a night (at least 3) and dealing with a sick toddler... my sleep is often interrupted. I seriously think the biggest injustice of pregnancy-- you should be able to catch up on sleep before having the baby that will wreck havoc on your sleep for the years to come.

*Best moment this week: Finishing the babies "space" today (see pics below!)

*Food cravings: I just finished an entire box of Cap'n Crunch with Crunch Berries in less than 24 hours. Need I say more. 

*Labor signs: Nope

*Belly button in or out: It's out. It's way weird.

*What I miss: sleeping on my stomach and sleeping through the night

*What I'm looking forward to: seeing Derek and meeting this little girl NEXT WEEK!!!

This is baby girl's home! It's in our master bedroom. I'm glad that even though she doesn't have her own room, that she has a definite "space" to call her own!

This is a word collage that my wonderful friend HanNah made for me. I saw one of these prints when we were out together last October. I had forgotten all about it and then she surprised me with it the other day! I love it!

Check out these before and after shots to see what we began with just a few weeks ago to get ready for this little girl! The drawers were a Christmas gift from Dad and he has been down several times the past month installing them (which included cutting out drywall, reinstalling drywall, sanding, painting, etc..). Isn't he amazing!? I just say it's proof that his little grand-daughter already has him wrapped around his finger. 

Okay, maybe me a little bit too. :)

We have a name and other baby news

Even though I'm only two weeks further along than when I picked Derek up at the airport, I feel as though as if I am about six weeks closer to being prepared for this little baby girl. My focus had always been on getting Derek home for Christmas and as soon as that happened my mind cleared up and I had time and energy to focus on baby things. Yay!

First and foremost, we have a plan. Well, as much as a plan as you can have regarding having a baby. This alone has been the most complicated, thought-provoking issue. We want Derek home... but we cannot have Derek missing class or a test and falling out of his graduation group. There is a room full of soldiers who fell behind for countless reasons that spend their days looking for the end of the internet day after day just waiting for a spot to open up for them to join a new class and graduate. For some it's just a day or two, a few weeks, others wait around for months. This is NOT an option. Fortunately, the weekend before my due date is a holiday weekend. We have had an induction planned (yes, I would rather the baby girl come on her own... but not more than having the opportunity for her daddy to be there when she comes) for Friday, February 18th. Derek is talking to his COs sometime this week (pending good moods... he'll wait if they are grumpy!) and we should know if he gets approved leave. Please, please pray for it to be approved. And then go ahead and pray for the baby to stay put until that day! We've decided that if she were to come early, we will just have him wait to come home on that weekend as to guarantee that he's not missing out on anything. As of right now, there is no plan B if he isn't granted time to come home. I guess I will just deal with that if it becomes an issue.

We do have a name. Finally. As in, we figured it out on the way to drop Derek off at the airport on Monday. Despite the pleas of everyone around us, we'll keep it to ourselves until she arrives. It's nothing personal. I just know of several people who've regretted telling because they were talked out of a name. I've decided I'd rather have people complain at my decision not to share than to bear people bombarding me with their perfect names as if I have never ever yet heard of them. And to expect me to say, "Oh yes! That's what we'll name her. I will just call my husband right now and let him know because you would know better than us about what to name her!". It's one thing to get a few sentimental suggestions here and there from family, but the other day in the pretzel line at the mall a woman was passionate that I strongly consider Sonya for the name of my child. Seriously.

We've made headway on where the little girl will call home! My Christmas gift from Dad was a cabinet for the empty hole in our bedroom that will serve as her dresser/changing table. I painted it. Dad and Derek started getting it set up... I'm so excited! We've actually got a plan for what her "space" will look like!

This is me at 31 weeks with the new cabinet!! 

(my belly has grown three inches since this picture)

*How far along?: 32 weeks, 5 days

*How big is your baby?: almost 4 pounds, approx. 19 inches

*Total weight gain?: 12 lbs. (only two over the holidays! That's typical for the average non-pregnant American!)

*Sex: Girl

*Maternity clothes: I feel like I wear the exact same thing all of the time 

*Stretch marks: Ugh. Yes. But how can I avoid them when my stomach grows three inches in matter of 14 days!
*Movement: All. of. the. time. 

*Sleep: Sleep was fabulous when Derek was home. I didn't end up sleeping on my back as much and so I didn't wake up being uncomfortable a lot. 

*Best moment this week: Having Derek home!! He got to feel the baby move a lot. We made a plan, got her space a little more ready, and picked out a name.

*Food cravings: Nothing too crazy. I will be purchasing Pizza Goldfish and chocolate ice cream when I go to the store next.
*Labor signs: I've started to get sporadic contractions... talk about annoying!

*Belly button in or out: more like a nothing... It's no longer in, but it's not quite out.

*What I miss: being able to walk up a flight of stairs without feeling as if I just completed a marathon

*What I'm looking forward to: Getting all of the final stuff together for her to come!

Trading blue for pink

I can't deny that it took a little while to get used to the idea that we are going to have a little girl. It's no secret that I have always wanted a little girl, but I was just so sure that this time it was going to be another girl. And then it dawned on me-- having a girl means so much extra work in the mean time!

I began searching through names hoping that'd help, but that was actually depressing. I am so committed to pick a name that means something- I can't just pick a name; it needs to come from somewhere... and there are very few girl names that I like and I haven't found one that I absolutely love.

So, Tuesday night after class I headed to the store and I went to check out the baby section. I found myself gravitation towards the boy section several times, but I made myself go back to the little girls stuff and I finally felt the excitement of having a little girl!

I am so excited to be the recipient of Chacey's hand-me-downs because she always has the cutest outfits, but I have vowed to not buy/receive any girl things until I go through all of Jackson's old clothes and send them packing. I just can't convince myself that I need to keep everything of his on the chance that we may need them in the future. Purchasing the two little onsies on Tuesday really helped motivate me to get it done and so I spent several hours this afternoon going through the boxes upon boxes of little boy clothes. I did keep a few of my favorites that I just couldn't party with.

We had 12 target diaper boxes filled with clothes that I separated into three piles: two for little boys at church and one to go to an organization that supports teen moms.

All so I can start to fill the closets with some pink and purple, ruffles and sparkles!

And in other non-related news... Linda bought Jackson a pair of boots today at Kohl's. Once he tried on the boots, he wouldn't let anyone take them off, so he actually wore them around the store. The only way I could convince him to take them off to put on pajamas was to let him take a shower first. And then he insisted on wearing them with his PJs...

Don't tell me this isn't normal...

Not only has he worn his boots all day, but he has been staring at them too-- even when he walks, so he ends up running into things. And he talks about them too. "Boots. Boots." But the cutest thing of all, is that he'll tell you that he has boots like his daddy. I like to think that's why he loves them so much!