Anniversary #7

Derek and I celebrated our seventh anniversary today!

I'm not sure who created the idea list for anniversary presents. Apparently, the traditional 7th anniversary gift is wool or copper. The modern gift is either a desk set or pen/pencil sets. While we didn't stick to tradition-- we still gifted each other equally un-romantic gifts... new shoes.

They might not be romantic, but they are certainly pricey!!!

I guess this means that by year seven comes around, you can pass up all extraneous gifts and go for the practical things! We both have particularly tender feet and it's important to have a good shoe to prevent many trips to the podiatrist. I wanted to stick to the doctor's orders when picking out my shoes... and that led me to getting a pair of shoes that are only two velcro straps away from being the number one shoe sold to senior citizens. At least it has some pink. Derek's shoes are cool, though!

Truthfully, the best part of our anniversary is that Derek wasn't away at army training!! His unit is typically scheduled for annual training during our anniversary and thanks to a change in plans, annual training isn't until August, so we got to spend our anniversary TOGETHER! How much more romantic can it be?!? 

Well, Derek actually took today off as an optional holiday so we got to spend all day together! We ventured to new restaurant for lunch and to went to a movie. We were a good three decades younger than anyone else in the theater! ... at least they weren't texting!

We opted for a day time-date to accomodate Jackson's t-ball game tonight. Going to a ball game might not sound like an ideal anniversary activity, but I think it was just perfect. Seven years ago, we said our vows and committed ourselves to each other and our future family. Today, we spent the evening supporting our little boy as he played a t-ball game having the time of his life (other than the inning he didn't get to catch the ball...). 

Celebrating marriage doesn't always need a romantic getaway. Today, we found joy in the life we started together and brought us to where we are... even if that means cleaning out the gutters. We cherish our family, we're thankful for our house, and we love each other more than when we said "I do".

Being the Wife in "Wife hat"

This past weekend, Derek and I attended a Strong Bonds marriage retreat hosted by the Army Chaplains here in Missouri. We didn't really know what to expect, but it turned out to be a really great experience. We were treated to two nights at the Four Seasons lodge in Osage Beach, most meals, and we came home with some great reading material! But more than all of that, it was just really, really, REALLY nice to have a full 2 1/2 days to focus on just being a wife!! And being a better wife at that. :)

It started out with an enjoyable three hour road trip through deadbeat rural Missouri. We seriously should have taken pictures of the sites we witnessed. A town called Tightwad, which included a closed down and vacant Tightwad Bank.

Sessions started on Friday night, resumed on Saturday morning and afternoon. Saturday evening was left open for a date night and we finished up on Sunday morning. There was a combination of speakers, panels, videos, and exercises. I laughed, I cried... and I only dozed off for like three minutes in the afternoon session on Saturday.

I think the biggest thing Derek and I both brought home from this weekend was a rekindled friendship. It sounds so simplistic, but it's true. With kids, jobs, school, etc. we were focusing more on co-parenting, maintaining the house, doing finances, blah blah blah.... But we laughed more together this weekend than we have in a long time. It was good.

When I named my blog, I purposefully wanted "wife hat" to be in front of "mom hat" because I know that my marriage should take priority, however, it's not always easy to make that happen. This weekend was a good reminder that I should be making more of an effort to always fulfilling my "wife hat" and letting other things fall behind it.

I will end with saying that I wish the Chaplains would have spent a little time addressing how not-good-husband-like it is to jump out from behind a corner to scare your wife after watching a creepy movie. Also, that good husbands with competitive (read: poor loser) wives should learn to lose at mini golf to minimize the case of the grumpies that follows.

Oh, but he did buy me a new Coach purse. And it was cute to see him excited that we got it on sale at the outlet mall. So, all is forgiven and he's still totally my BFF. :)

Six Years

Derek and I are celebrating six years of marriage today!  Or, as I explained to Jackson: it’s the day that Mommy wore her princess dress and Mommy and Daddy said that we will love each other forever! 

Here’s a flashback to our big day back in 2006:

Oh, and here’s another picture—my brother-in-law, Brad, eating like every single sandwich we had!

 
But I think the time has come to finally forgive him—he spent the evening cleaning my kitchen! Like, hardcore cleaning. In fact, he’s washing my dishes {the ones that didn’t fit when he loaded the dishwasher!}. I could get used to this treatment! I can honestly say, he’s my favorite brother-in-law!

And Derek worked on our laundry chute today to make it functional and child-safe! Just what I wanted! :)

It's March!!

It's March 1st, ya'll. Derek is coming home *this* month. If you haven't jumped up from your seat and shouted, "WOO HOO!" yet then maybe you didn't hear me correctly.

DEREK IS COMING HOME IN 17 DAYS!!

(per the tentative plan, we still don't have a confirmed date, 

but whatever day it may be-- it's close!)

And let me tell you that it won't be a day too soon! I miss that man so incredibly much! If I didn't have two children at home, I'd consider packing my things and just camping out at the airport.

In effort to make light of my missing Derek in the beginning of our separation, I made a list of things that I wouldn't miss so much about him being gone. I have definitely enjoyed the freedom to wear his clothes and always being able to pick my movie of choice (when it's not the Backyardigans or Thomas the Train)... and of course, the lack of conversations involving topics of farting and bowel movements has been nice.

But I'm really ready for him to come home and I'm more than willing to let go of some of those perks if it means that he's home! (Though, if he's going to fart in bed and trap it under the covers, he may as well just stay in Georgia.) I have a new list of things that I am looking forward to for when he comes home...aside from the super obvious, mushy I-just-can't-wait-to-have-my-best-friend-home reasons.

1. Having someone to warm my cold feet in bed.
2. Man smell of the cologne, deodorant, and shampoo variety.
3. Not having to drive absolutely everywhere we go (I never noticed until he came home at Christmas and I got a driving break. It was nice!)
4. Light bulb replacer. I will never hassle him about his obsessive need to have a bazillion light bulbs on hand.
5. Going to the movies together--like that will be easy with two kids, but it's our favorite thing to do together.
6. Sitting next to him at church.
7. Watching him play with Jackson and Belle- nothing is cuter than a man when he plays with kids!
8. Laughing with him at our lame inside jokes.
9. Being kept up to date about the latest technology/gadget news and silly websites that can waste hours of your time. 
10. So I can kiss him anytime I want. (Sweet Home Alabama style)

I have to quit re-reading my list because I'm just getting to giddy! Here's hoping the next couple weeks just fly by! 

Twelve Days... and counting

My Christmas celebration starts in 12 days when my much desired Christmas present arrives at the airport at 10:14am. Having Derek home is loooong overdue and I am soooo excited.

But I am quite overwhelmed. It's different from when we went to visit him in Georgia. It's not just a trip about getting to see each other for a few days. He is coming home.

A home that isn't quite the same. Furniture has been moved. A 16-year-old moved in. Jackson has grown. And routines have changed. It's not that he won't expect change, but it's the fear that he won't like it. That his much needed vacation will be somewhat stressful or a disappointment to what he has looked forward to for so long. I'm no stranger to the psychological issues that our soldiers deal with and coming home isn't an easy process. Just as our life isn't exactly how he left it, he is different now too. It's almost like an experiment, a waiting game, just to determine the reaction of the two worlds colliding.

Not that it's ever intentional. Not that anyone is to blame.

Can I ever truly understand the process he went through to become a soldier? Can I even begin to relate to the expectations and strenuous schedule that he is lives in? Can he dive right back into a chaotic life of a young family after being surrounded entirely by "grown-ups" for six months? Can Jackson understand how Daddy can simply show up one day? Even just the little things... he's used to getting up at 4am everyday. And he eats a huge breakfast now (I mean, wouldn't you if you had just ran seven miles?).

Wow, aren't I depressing!? It's not that I'm not excited. Just thinking about watching him walk down the terminal in just a few days can bring me to tears at any given moment. I'm just nervous! This may sound very silly. But have you seen the divorce statistics after active duty assignments!? I do not fear that fate for us, but it it does shine a light on the fact that it's hard. And maybe these aren't even issues for this little trip coming home, but for when he comes home for good in March.

Either way, I can't seem to shake this off today. I had to jump start my car this morning and my neighbor called out to ask if everything was okay. I assured him I had it all under control and was using every bit of my effort just to hold myself together so I didn't break down in front of him and say, "no, actually it's not!"

I know that we will have a wonderful Christmas. And even though I know everything will be fine, it doesn't stop the apprehension. It's ridiculous to focus my energy on all of these things in which I have no control over. Instead, I will do my best to focus on the list of actual things can be done.

I will start by cleaning up his side of the bed/room.

His side of the bed has become an extension of my closet and convenient location for clean laundry. He hates the extra pillows on the bed, so they especially can't reside only on his side. I may have cluttered his closet while looking for the duffel bag and those boxes are full of stuff that doesn't even belong to him.

I also need to make sure his t-shirts/sweatshirts/sweatpants get put back in his drawers so I can pretend that I don't wear them almost everyday.

With this ring...

Today I am wearing my wedding ring for the first time nearly three months. Oh how I've missed it!!

When summer came around this year, the ring was just too tight and uncomfortable to wear. Of course the obvious reason would be that it shrunk, because we just aren't going to explore the other options. It was before I got pregnant (or knew I was pregnant, at least) so that's not even really to blame. I took it in to get resized several weeks ago and have just now gotten around to making my way back to Independence Center to pick it up.

I am so happy to have it back!! At least until I swell up even more in a couple of months and won't be able to wear it again. Especially since Derek has been gone, I've been longing for my ring, as if for nothing else to let the outside world know that I am married. Not that anyone else probably noticed at all... but I did. And I am proud of my marriage and am super glad that too have my bling back so I can show it off!!

And he's gone...

I'm a horrible wife. Instead of sobbing my eyes out right now, I am actually experiencing feelings more closely relate to relief, like this moment couldn't have come soon enough.

Anticipating this day has been emotionally exhausting for the past several months, but especially this week. We have filled our time with finishing house projects, making sure to hang out with as many people as possible, and trying to make every moment count. Yet looking back at our week, my favorite memories include staying up late (okay, midnight) laughing at the best of SNL commercial parodies, getting into intense games of tennis and baseball on the Wii, and just enjoying the little kisses and hand-holding throughout each day.

Despite being prone to cry randomly throughout the week (no thanks to Elmo's Deployment video), the final goodbye was really nothing more than just some tear-filled eyes. I really attribute it to emotional exhaustion-- I can assure you I am very sad and I miss him already, not to mention how very proud I am. I know the next eight months will fly by and we will be driving to the airport to pick him up before we even know it (positive thinking... right!?)

Fortunately, I made plans to stay up at my parents tonight so Mom can help with Jackson and I can just get a grip on myself and relax a bit. I will be back in the swing of things by Tuesday to prepare for Julie to get here on Saturday! Like I told Derek, "I just don't have much time to feel sorry for myself!", to which he replied, "it's probably better this way." Good thing he's not here to read me writing that he was right! :)

Anyway, a few pictures from today: 

Jackson was too preoccupied with his juice to look at the camera.

I love this man!!

Some last minute tickle-time

 This is the closest Derek got to getting a hug from the little twerp.

And now I can't wait to find a warm comfy bed to crawl into and stay until late morning-- or until I have to get up to pee. 

Date Night

I received so many super fabulous birthday wishes this year- seriously, it was amazing! Here's just some love that was sent my way:

• 
  

  Happy birthday, Amy! I hope today is the best birthday you have ever had. Make Derek take you somewhere wonderful.

• 
  

  Happy birthday Amy. I hope it brings you as much delight as you bring the rest of us. :)

• 
  

  I simply love you tons and a million, dear friend! Have a marvelous, wonderful day!

• 
  

  Amy, I hope you have a fabulous birthday with lots of love and attention showered on you!

Man, do I feel loved! I did have a wonderful day- did the whole watch kids thing during the day and when Derek got home, we went out for a date night!

We love going to the movies and we haven't been to one in several months. The only time we have to go is on the weekends and I don't know if you've checked out movie ticket prices lately but they are outrageous. We were even bummed to see that the Weekday Escape prices went up to $6 a piece.

We bought our tickets first because they have the whole assigned seating thing now too. Is that weird for anyone else or just us? I really don't see the point- aside from opening weekend for big movies. Then we walked over to Panera for dinner and it was so nice to sit and chat with Derek.

Derek had earned a free drink and two popcorns with his movie rewards card so we headed to the concession line after walking back to the theater. Who knows how long it's been since I've gone to the concessions at a movie- but $17 for popcorn and drinks?! Who pays that?! But it didn't really matter since we had free coupons. I was so annoyed when a man just walked right up and cut in front of us to order but then another line opened up and I turned around to see my old friend Jenny behind the register. It was so unexpected, so sweet. It seriously made my day. Thank you Mr. Line-Cutter Man!


I had gotten mixed reviews about the movie Date Night, but I love a good laugh so that was my pick. And it was a great pick. I have not laughed that much in a very long time (Derek would probably want me to mention that I did indeed 'snort' but I just couldn't help it. Steve Carell was pole dancing- just too funny.) These two are SO funny together- they should do lots of movies together like Doris Day and Rock Hudson. This being said, one must have an appreciation for that this type of comedy and it's not one that I would recommend going to see with your grandmother.

Derek and I spent the entire drive home quoting the movie and laughing at the movie all over again. It was such a great night out and a much needed one at that because I have two huge papers due in the next couple of weeks (one due next Tuesday) that will be draining all of my free time.

I married my best friend

Before we started dating, Derek and I were best friends. We lived in the same apartment building (one floor apart) and we hung out all of the time. And it wasn't like we were ever planning on dating either, it was truly a great, platonic friendship. We went to a dinner at our church once and we were seated next to each other and people kept asking if we were a couple and we replied, "uhm, no..."

Then Christmas break came and while I was sitting at home in Trenton bored to death (hard to imagine, I know) I realized that I missed talking to him. I was so caught off guard. I really did not see that coming. I spent the entire four weeks of break wondering if I missed him because he was such a good friend of if it was something more. Fortunately for me, it was settled the day we got from Christmas break. That was five years ago and he has been my best friend ever since.

Back when we first started dating in 2005

So this Monday I come home from class and I was a mess. School is so much more work this semester than I had anticipated and I feel like I am just spread so thin. I just cried and he listened. He hugged me and was so supportive. I went on and on and on- and he was so completely there for me and I thanked him for being my best friend. Tuesday was the longest day ever. Jackson decided he didn't need to nap and was a never ending bottle of energy. I all but threw him on my MIL's door step. I have never been so excited to be studying in my life.

This afternoon, I see a lady walk up to the door with some flowers. I had seriously thought that she had the wrong address. Then she said my name and was so confused. I mean, it's not my birthday and I'm that sick. I was so surprised to see that Derek had sent me flowers. I love flowers! And they were 'just because' flowers. It really just made my day, my week, and actually probably the rest of the semester. The card read none other than:

I am so thankful for my husband. We are a team. And to think that I never saw this coming...

My 'just because' flowers