We're making it!

I have survived one full week now at my internship. As with the start of most new jobs, it started off pretty slow. But, it's picking up and I'm finding myself right at home among some of society's frowned-upon and ignored members.

The kids have transitioned smoothly into their new routine. Last week, they enjoyed time with their grandparents and this week was their first official time week with Miss Beth. Jackson loves his new lunchbox and he is a great helper in packing it and getting it ready.

We're still settling into a routine during the evening, but we're finding ourselves so productive and efficient with our time. Our time together has been shorter than usual, but it's been enjoyable and sweet.

One thing is for sure-- everything has been coming together so perfectly and smoothly. I'm such a different person than I was even just last week in terms of being anxious, stressed, and tearful. I know I've been covered in prayer by so many wonderful, supportive people and it's obvious in my life and how everything has just come into place. It's been great to have received so many emails, facebook posts, and text messages letting me know I've been prayed for and checking to see how we're doing. I have the greatest friends. :)

And a HUGE thanks to my the hubby-- could go on and on, but people don't tend to enjoy a lot of mushiness. Basically, he's amazing and he complements be perfectly. {And he compliments me too. Especially lately! He's surprised after work almost everyday when he comes home and I actually look like a lady... aka- not in yoga pants, sweatshirt, and ponytail!}

I'll end with saying that my one of the biggest downers about leaving the kiddos in daycare is missing out on some of their firsts-- especially Belle because I was always home with Jackson at his age. Well, it only took a day and a half for that to happen. Belle threw up for the first time and it was with Miss Beth. Poor Miss Beth, but I'm not all that sad about not having to clean it up! Thankfully, my sister is still on Christmas break and watched Belle pottied today since she couldn't go back to daycare. Turns out, another "first" happened at my parents-- she in the tub... {the gross kind}. Can't say I'm bummed about missing that either! I guess there are some "firsts" worth missing!! :)

Father’s Day

My kiddos have the best Daddy.

And I do too!

We enjoyed a nice Father’s Day up at my parents house. We celebrated with my parents, Derek’s parents, and Great Grandpa {Linda’s dad}. I love it when our families come together! We’re so blessed.

I asked Jackson about his favorite thing about Daddy and then he asked me what my favorite thing was. {I said that Daddy works really hard to provide for our family and protects us to keep us safe.} Then, Jackson turns to Derek and says, “What’s YOUR favorite thing about you?!” Haha. Derek replied, “my awesome good looks…”

These are Jackson’s favorite things:

• Daddy: Playing tackle {and demonstrated what looked like a sit up}
• Great Grandpa: Going to McDonalds and shooting baskets
• Papa Forrest and Papa Johne: something about fixing tractors. {no clue!}

Like I said before, we’re just super blessed with lots of great father’s in our family!

Mother’s Day

I had a wonderful time celebrating Mother’s Day yesterday. It was definitely my favorite Mother’s Day yet. Mostly because Jackson made me a necklace and kept telling me “Happy Mother’s Day” and “Happy Valentine’s Day” interchangeably.

Jackson was so happy to give me the necklace he made in Sunday School. He said, “I made it for you!” and when I said, “Oh, I LOVE it!” He replied, “I’m so glad you like it! I love you Mom!” Make my heart melt!

My kids were really well behaved practically all day, which was a wonderful treat! I told Derek it was so nice not to have to be a mean mom for an entire day! I could easily get used to that!!

I love my kiddos and I’m so glad to be their mom {or “naa-nee” as Belle calls me}.

I’m also super thankful for my Mom. Even though I can’t french braid or sew matching dresses for Belle and her baby dolls, I hope that I can still be a super awesome mom like her. I’m blessed with a great Mother-in-law as well! I’m a lucky gal!

Back to School

I went to my first class of the semester tonight. Remember just a few months ago when I wrote a super heartfelt post about totally embracing being “just a mom”!? Well, at some point in the mere weeks after that post, I was overcome by the finishing-grad-school itch. This January marks the fourth year of classes… obviously not full time. But classes here and there. A break after each kid was born, a summer off when we bought and remodeled our home.

 

Also in attendance was my faithful purple backpack that was purchased for my freshman year at undergrad. Oh my goodness, she’ll turn 10 years old this year! That totally just dawned on me! I love this backpack. It has spongy straps that make carrying books less annoying plus, it’s decorated with a keychain a friend got for me in high school.

 

 

 

I am 27 hours into the 60 hours required to graduate with my Master’s in Counseling Psychology. It’s this giant task at which I haven’t finished, and until I finish, I feel like I’m a failure. I just want to get it over with. {That sounds as if I don’t enjoy school, and I mean, I don’t love all the work, but I do actually enjoy it. I just don’t like it hanging over my head: You still have XX hours left. You still have to apply for candidacy. You still need to find an internship.}

So, I enrolled in classes. Three of them. We took a round-about process that will better suit our family schedule and our finances, which is awesome. But regardless, that is still nine hours of grad school in one semester. The most I’ve done was six and that was a very hard time! But I can do this {or so my husband keeps telling me!}.

We’ve gotten pretty organized in the process of planning for the semester. Failing to plan is planning to fail, right? I will be staying with my parents on Monday evenings and Mom will have the kids when I’m at class all day on Tuesdays {classes eight hours in one day!? Not sure I can survive this}. They live much closer to my Tuesday school. I have another class on Wednesday evenings. It’s a hybrid class, so we only meet for an hour and a half, but that also means I have to find additional hours of time in the week to watch the lectures and take notes.

Which, is why we have decided to employ a super sweet gal to come watch the kids one or two afternoons a week. This allows a dedicated time for school work and so I’m not trying to squeeze it all in after bedtime. We’ve been meal planning according to schedule and I have several frozen meals in place. Meals picked out for when I’m in class on Tuesdays and for when I’m gone in the afternoons doing school work. I still have my mornings open for MOPS, play dates, library time, and housework. Our babysitting agreement also includes one night a month to plan for a date night. I swear, if it’s not scheduled, it’s just not happening!

Good grief. I’m stressed out just writing that all down. Actually, I was stressed before that. I had my first class tonight and it was the first time it dawned on me that this is going to be a lot of hard work. Starting a little stressed has snowballed into all out ridiculousness.

I’m stressed about:

• school work/tests/papers in general
• diagnosing mental disorders—it’s is my least favorite thing to do in grad school and I have a whole class attributed to just that. Ugh.
• being the very first presenter in my diagnosis class!? Stupid last initial. Not that my maiden one was any better.
• am I even smart enough for this!?

I feel guilty about:

• not having a job to earn money
• costing money to pay for school
• costing more money for childcare
• not being there to provide the childcare for my kids
• not having super lavish birthday parties for my kids like I see on some blogs because we spend money for me to go to school instead of renting out Gymboree, hiring a decorator, and having Dora show up.

Okay seriously, those are all things floating in my head. And honestly, I am super worried about gaining a bazillion pounds. I eat when I’m stressed {a habit I am diligently trying to change}! We have been working hard at adopting a healthier lifestyle-think trips to the gym, healthier foods—and it’s really hard to commit to change in the midst of chaos.

I feel a little ridiculous getting that all out, but I needed to have it in writing. At this point, I have to trust the Lord to guide me through it all. I need to know where I started so when I come out alive on the other end, I can look back and see how the Lord brought us through.

And because I refuse to let my overwhelming thoughts get the best of me, so I made sure to make a list of blessings to give me perspective!

Blessings

• successful permission to enroll at cheaper school
• having a schedule that allows for sufficient family time
• people I love and trust to provide childcare
• great supportive husband {and family}
• opportunity to study something I’m passionate about!

Whew! This was a long post. Belle turned 11 months today! I will post with her pictures and updates tomorrow!

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving from our cute, little turkey!

We have so many things to be thankful for this year, but more than anything I am thankful that we get to spend the holiday together, as a family this year!

Life is still good

I can't wait to share pictures and stories of having Derek back in our lives over the past two weeks! Time went by so quickly, but at the same time, we really made the most of it and so it feels like it was a lot longer than just a couple weeks. I am quite surprised with myself. I don't even feel too sad at the moment. Instead, I feel so refreshed (despite being exhausted) from having him home and confident that the next ten weeks will be a breeze. Okay, maybe not a breeze, but I know that we'll make it. This separation is only temporary and this break showed me that our family will bounce back in no time once he's home in March.

While these past two weeks were quite possibly the best two weeks ever, I cannot deny that I have missed my online social media. Gmail. Facebook. Twitter. Blogger... do you even recognize me!? Don't get me wrong, I would give them all up if it meant that Derek was here right now instead of on a plane headed back to Georgia...

But he is not. And instead of being a complete mess, I am enjoying a nice relaxing evening catching up on my google reader, emails, tweets, etc. I had full expectations of uploading all of my recent pictures and begin posting about them tonight, but that's just not going to happen. It didn't hit me until I was driving out of the parking garage at the airport how exhausted I am from going, going, and going so much while Derek was home! I will definitely be going to bed early tonight and will enjoy a nice lazy day tomorrow (thanks to my mother who has Jackson-duty) to recoup... and sometime over the next 24 hours I know that I will eventually end up a crying mess. That's just easier dealt when I'm not responsible for a little person who can't understand why Mommy is sad at the moment.

Overall though, I refuse to feel too sorry for myself. What a blessing it was to have him home! We're all healthy and happy. We're surrounded by amazing friends and family. And even though we're hundreds of miles apart, we still have each other. Life is still good.

The Real American Heroes

To celebrate Veteran's Day today, we headed out to the Hy-Vee breakfast with Grandpa. We started this tradition last year and I hope that we can continue for many years to come! It's more than just having Jackson spend time with Great-Grandpa, it's about exposing him to the real heroes of our society. He's still a little young to understand, but I did my best at explaining that the men and women there today were all soldiers like Daddy! It is so important to let him know that we honor and support our veterans-- of all branches, active duty or retired, family members and even strangers!

Jackson and Great-Grandpa Duff, Retired Air Force

Jackson really surprised me this morning as I was getting him dressed. Chacey had on her shirt first and he pointed and said, "flag!" I really didn't know he knew the concept of the flag. And then he cheered, "wooohh!" I haven't quite figured out where he picked up on cheering for the flag, aside from maybe at Derek's Basic Graduation, when he had a flag and we cheered for Daddy. Either way, it was just really sweet.

Jackson and Chacey got really into waving their flags!

And of course, eating breakfast!

We can't wait to celebrate with our number one Veteran next year! We love you Derek and we are so very proud of you!! He is heading off post this evening to attend an appreciation dinner at a local church and he is VERY excited. (He was very disappointed about missing a pot-luck dinner at our church last week and so this is his consolation!)

A big thank you to all the servicemen, past and present. Derek and I both have several Veteran family members and friends, both active duty and retired, and they each were contributed inspiration in Derek's decision to enlist. And lots of prayers go out to the men and women serving in battle right now.

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." - John Fitzgerald Kennedy

I took this quotation from a friend's facebook page. I just love it. For some good, easy ideas to do something for a soldier, check out this link.

But let's not just focus only on the members serving in combat. I think we tend to reach out to families and pray intently for those on Active Duty, which I undoubtedly believe is our civilian duty. However, let's not forget about the ones who've already served and are now back home. Soldier suicide is at an all-time high these days- June marks the all time high with 34 deaths. This is not okay. Have you seen last years Oscar-winning movie, The Hurt Locker?! (Not that I recommend it for a relaxing night in, but as a good image of the psychological battle our soldier endure).

Thousands of men and women come home each month and are fortunate enough still have all of their limbs, no visible scars, and most of their friends. However, each and every soldier will come home with psychological scars that may haunt them forever- some more serious than others. The divorce rate upon returning soldiers is through the roof. These people are not only fighting overseas; they have intense battles to fight upon returning home.

The military has improved the services they proved greatly in the past decade, but we need to do our part too. Granted, there's not a lot we can say or do considering they experienced something we can not even fathom to understand. However, genuine love and support, deep gratification, and reaching out to them can go a long way. Never trivialize what they do. Listen if you have a friend who wants to talk about it. But more likely, if they don't want to talk about it-- don't pry. You can let them know you are there for them without having dig. And truth be told, we probably couldn't cope with the real details anyway. Most importantly, remember these soldiers in your prayers, and pray intently. Thank the Lord for our real American heroes.

The climb

In the summer of 2005 I climbed a mountain, not too far out of Colorado Springs. I will still acknowledge to this day that climbing to the top of the nearly 15,000 foot mountain top was by far one of the hardest physical things I have ever done in my life.

The rocky terrain made the footwork so complicated. The Rocky mountains aren't big boulders to climb around; they are more like little pebbles. With each step forward, I'd end up sliding back gaining only mere inches at times. The altitude was killing my lungs. I was winded and exhausted even though my body could keep going. It was so aggravating. But I made it.

This week marks the two month mark that Derek has been gone. Instead of being my hardest physical challenge like the mountain, it is by far the toughest mental and emotional battles I've endured. I am continually climbing and unfortunately, I haven't even made it past the tree line yet with six months still left to go.

The intention of this post is not induce pity or to complain, but simply just to describe the journey. To document for me what it was like in this moment.

I can say that in both situations, even though it was a tough challenge, it is far from the worst thing that has ever happened to me. While climbing the mountain in 2005, I was able to enjoy the company of new friends. I hadn't had the opportunity to spend a lot of time with this group of people that summer, so it was very fun to have this experience in particular to share with them. Similarly, I have had unique opportunities present themselves in this time in which I have been able to have lots of fun and even meet new people.

Unlike the when I climbed the mountain, I have an entire community of people who are carrying me along this time around. I have people I can call in a pinch. I have people that continually offer support. I have people literally calling me with offers to come help.

I am so deeply blessed. But these blessings lead to one of the biggest internal struggles I face-- the constant need of needing help. I have always prided myself on being a strong, independent, capable woman and though I never thought I could do this on my own, I never thought I'd need so much help. It is humbling, it is frustrating. The shower breaks. Something in the basement is leaking. I need chemicals spread on my lawn but can't do it because I'm pregnant. Mold. The garbage disposal again. At times, I feel lazy and spoiled, yet others I feel utterly helpless. It really is a mental obstacle that I have to chose to overcome and to simply get over it.

Not surprisingly, the hardest part really is living my life without Derek. I can honestly say that I never realized how much I truly need him each and every day. But really, I just miss him. I hate being the only one to watch Jackson grow up and pick a favorite color only to turn around to try to relay the experience with a pen and paper so Derek can read about it in five days. The 15 minute weekly phone calls are a privilege, I know that. But after the "do you need stamps?" and "have you checked the bills" conversations, there isn't a lot of time to just talk with my husband. I can't just call him up during the day to ask a quick question, I can't decompress from a stressful day to have him tell me to just let it go, and I don't get to share my many opinions about what's happening in the world. I miss my best friend.

I feel that I am constantly tired. Not even in a sense that I didn't get enough sleep. But in a way that I am always "on."

Monday night the trash goes out. Tuesday, bring the trash container back to the house. The electric bill comes out of the account on the 5th, student loans on the 13th. Why won't the garage door stay down? I have a doctors appointment, have I lined up someone to watch Jackson? Wait, it's quiet... where is Jackson? 

When I take anywhere (even at home, but that's easier) I am the one who is responsible for him at any given moment. Jackson is a very, very busy little guy and even to keep mental track of what he is up to is exhausting. There's no tag-teaming at entertaining the kid or taking turns acting as the human jungle gym. When Jackson wakes up in the middle of the night (which is A LOT) I am the one who needs to be there for him. Even the little decisions about keeping him fed, jacket or no jacket, or planning the days events... they jus add up. Sometimes, I just long for a day of not having to decide anything at all! A day without scheduling "the next step" or "the next seven steps" is probably more like it, because with every minor adjustment to the schedule results in changes for the rest of the day.

It's not like I don't have help. Far from it. Last week, Jackson spent the night a total of four nights at my mom's house. Aside from the feeling that I am too lazy or incapable of taking care of my son, it was nice to sleep through the night and it was a needed break. But truth be told, I needed that time. I had grad school work to catch up on, teenage birthday parties to host, and a myriad of unexpected events to sort through. As much as I would have enjoyed lounging around catching up on season one of Glee so I could watch the season premier tonight, that just didn't happen.

So, it's not that I haven't don't have the help that I need with Jackson. I just want my parter back so we can do it together. I don't like that my "breaks" require Jackson to be gone. I want to be able to "turn off" for a few moments here and there, but still have my favorite little guy still here. The chance to play with and enjoy Jackson while someone else can attend to his needs or the discipline. But that's just a part of single parenthood. But unlike single parenthood, I can anticipate a day when Derek will return.

My life is absolutely wonderful. I love being a Mommy and I am having a blast with Julie. It's possible that I just have too many things going on, but I can't have it any other way. If I wasn't occupied at nearly every moment of the day, I think I'd just have more time to dwell in self-pity and I refuse. I consider myself lucky that this is truly my hardest obstacle and unlike so many with husbands on active duty, mine is still stateside, which offers a peace knowing he's not off at war.

Time has gone by so fast that I can't believe that I get to see Derek in two weeks!! I am beyond giddy. Just thinking about the visit is enough to lift my spirits and knowing that after his graduation from basic training, he will quickly earn phone privileges every day and eventually a computer.

Upon completing the climb up and back down again of the mountain in 2005 I vowed never to do it again. I accomplished it once and that was good. After Derek gets home, I have my hopes that I never have to climb this mountain again, but this time it's not up to me. I realize that luxury isn't likely, but that is another issue for another day.

Thank you to everyone who has helped out-- you know who you are. I could never tackle this mountain alone. You've made this journey fun and entertaining.Your support, encouragement, and helping hands are what keeps me going.

Grandparent's Day

Jackson has totally hit the jackpot of grandparents. Not only because they are just a great help to me, but they just love him so much! They are always excited for him to come visit, eager to take him places and to do new things, and are just so involved in his life.

They were all so excited to meet Jackson, especially being the first grandbaby on both sides!

This is one proud Papa. He loves having Jackson be his helper.

Grammy was wonderful at keeping Jackson entertained as we waiting at Children's Mercy for Jackson to get glued back together!

Grandpa passes on his loyalty to the best teams around. Look how happy these boys are!

Grandma loves to share her iphone so Jackson can watch Elmo and play memory games.

Jackson is fortunate enough to have SIX living great-grandparents, all of whom he has met (though I couldn't find pictures with them all)!

Great Grandma Dryer was happy to hold her first great-grandson on Thanksgiving 2008.

Great Grandma Trickel got down on the ground to play with the little guy before he was even crawling!

We were so happy when Great-Grandpa Duff decided to move back to MO after living the past few decades in California! Jackson always goes straight for the pen in his shirt pocket!!

(not pictured are Great-Grandma Duff, 

Great-Grandma Chapman, and Great-Grandma Creason)

Happy Grandparent's Day!! Derek and I couldn't have picked greater grandparents if we'd have tried! Thanks for all you do, but most importantly, thanks for loving him so much and so being involved in his life!

Custom Artwork... again.

People have been more than generous with giving me a helping hand since Derek's been gone. People have mowed my yard, watched Jackson, cooked dinner among many other things. Well, the other day at church a couple of ladies who clean houses by vocation, came up to me and asked if they could come and clean house-- at no cost every couple of weeks. I was around a ton of people, having a rather not-very-good day, and it literally took all my effort not to cry as I said, "Uhm... yes, please!"

So, they came over yesterday morning. They tackled the kitchen, dining room, living room, the bathrooms, all the bedrooms. I mean, it looked spectacular. I say looked because I have since cooked and Jackson has gotten out all of his toys, but it's only clutter. I can see out of my windows, no grimy fingerprints. I'm no longer distracted by the dust on my picture frames and shelves down the hallway. The crayon all over the bathtub (it's allowed) is all cleaned up and so is the artwork on the wall where Jackson redecorated the week before Derek left.

They ladies spent several hours here in the morning and left around the time I was getting lunch ready for the kiddos. Jackson was having a meltdown, "I waaaant a baaanaaanaaa" and I was willfully ignoring him. I walked in to put their plates on their table* to find an entirely new piece of artwork on my wall by a very pretty, little cutie who just likes the color purple.

Seriously!?! The cleaning ladies had only been gone not even seven whole minutes. Jackson had carried in the box of crayons in the midst of his fit and I just placed them on the counter. I did not think to count them. Clearly, there was one missing and was used to add some flair to my dining room, yet again. At least the ladies told me how to clean it off and maybe I will actually get it off before they come again.

*I've been looking for a new table for the kiddos to use. The table we were using only had one chair and the kids were able to knock it over pretty easily. I had been browsing craigslist for a few weeks and found one close by and at a good price. They used a cell phone to take a picture and I was under the impression that I was on my way to pick up gray and hunter green table. Much to my surprise, it was purple, teal, and pink. Oh well. It works!

Fun, but tiring weekend

We had a great weekend. Derek's going away party was a great success. It is such an encouragement to know we have so many friends and family who are here to support us both in these upcoming months.

 Derek grilled the yummy hotdogs.

And HanNah made all the wonderful food!

Derek was so excited about all of the attention he received-- especially the kisses from Aunt Leah.

Our dear friends Billy and Gina traveled up from Springfield just to come. He was our campus minister at the BSU down at college and he has continued to be an encouragement to us!

Jackson walked into a cabinet on Sunday morning before church ending up with a nice big boo-boo on his eye. We went to Applebee's with Derek's parents after church and Jackson ended up falling asleep in his chair. I had to put my hand down to keep his head from crashing into the table to prevent another big mark on his face.

I had a host-parent orientation meeting yesterday afternoon while Derek and his dad looked at his car that wouldn't start (ugh!). My cousin Greg and his wife Andrea came over with their daughter Bethany last night for dinner. They live in Prague, but are back for a few months. It was good to catch up and visit.

We have a busy week ahead of us as it's Derek's last week before he heads off to basic. He has the week off work so we have lots of time to spend together--Yay! We are heading out this afternoon to go visit his brother in St. Louis for the night and we will be driving back tomorrow. Uncle Joe is coming over to help get started on getting the basement studded a couple days this week and one of these days we are going to go on a date night at Derek's two favorite places-- Burger King and AMC Theaters, and use the gift cards our wonderful friends Jeff and Missy gave us (who also traveled up from Springfield for the weekend, but I didn't get a picture.)

So anyway, I probably won't be on here much more this week. But I'll be back next week for sure. Please keep us in your prayers as we prepare for him to leave!!

Oh! And Julie arrived safely in the US yesterday and is at a two-week language camp at Bryant University on the east coast. Yay!

Sunshine

Growing up, this was a nickname of mine. My parents would tell me that I would wake up singing and just sing all day long. In fact, Dad and I danced to "You are My Sunshine" at my wedding.

Awhile back, a friend said to me, "I need some Amy-time because you are just the most positive person I know," and that was by far, the greatest compliment I had ever received. So, you can imagine it made me feel good to receive this award from a fellow blog friend:

For the blogs that add a little sunshine to your day

I really do try to find the positive things in life and I try my very hardest to focus on those things. It does take effort at times, but overall it's something that God has given me the ability to do. I love knowing that I can bring a positive attitude to the table and hopefully make someone smile each day.

So, I have three blogs I want to pass this award along to:

• AlittleMcD: A blog-friend that I actually do know in real life-- she's got two super cute little boys and she takes amazing photos. But more importantly, the boys give her great material to add humor to my day, which includes anytime she tries to take a shower when her boys are awake and her multiple JumperPOO stories (three times!). Seriously, it makes me laugh everytime.
• ThisMamaRocks: This blog is great because every day, she's giving away free stuff. I mean, what better way is there to bring sunshine!? Maybe one of these days I will end up winning something!
• SingleInfertileFemale: This girl has had some tough luck, but each and every day she continues to write and focus on the good things that happen to her. It makes me think, "Okay, if she can have a positive attitude, then I should too." And I'm super excited for the baby-making plans to start soon.

Happy Father's Day (x4)

To My Father:
You have surpassed all "dad-duties" this year in, not only in serving as the general contractor for our house remodel, but in becoming a friend and someone I call just because. Okay, there is normally some sort of house/car/yard question in each conversation, but I promise that's not always my intention! The past few months have been tough for you and I wish that I could've done more. But, like I said on your card: This gift certificate doesn't come close to what you deserve, but I promise to get you the best nursing home care that Trenton has to offer someday. You are a great Papa to Jackson- he loves you very much. I know that he is just aching to be old enough to build all of those kits that you've gotten from Lowe's. And the use the shotgun you bought him among all the other cool things you have in store. Thanks for everything. We love you!

To the father of my son:
You are such a great daddy to Jackson. There's a reason that he looks out the window each afternoon waiting to see your car pull in the driveway-- he just cannot wait to play with you! It is one of my most favorite things to see you and Jackson rolling around, tackling, chasing, boxing (maybe not so much this one) with him and the giggles I hear in delight because Jackson is so happy with you. I know you feel a little guilty about missing out on watching him grow up for the several months that you will be gone, but you are still being a great daddy by serving this country and making it a safe place for us and all the other little kids here too. Thank you for working hard and providing for our family, and keeping a positive attitude about your job, even when it's stressful sometimes. I would not want to raise a family with anyone but you. I love you!

To my Father-in-Law
The majority what you've done for me was before I even knew your son. You taught him what it means to be a loving husband and a wonderful father. You are also a top-notch father-in-law, too. I know that you'd be there for me whenever I needed and that you'd do it with a smile on your face. You are one of Jackson's favorite people and I enjoy seeing both of your faces light up whenever you see each other. I am thankful to have married into the family.

To Grandpa Duff:
The Grandpa's that I grew up with have all passed away, but you invited me into this family from the very first time I met you. We were so excited to hear you were moving back to the great midwest after Jackson was born. Thank you so much for coming over on the days when I have class and playing with Jackson until Derek gets home. Without you, grad school wouldn't be a possibility for me. We love meeting you at McDonald's for lunch and all the toys (even the noisy, singing pig) that you spoil Jackson with. We love you!

Work, play, and the list

We spent a lot of today getting stuff done around the house. Derek got up early and mowed- Jackson helped. He also cleaned out the gutters, which are less than six months old and already had little sprouts growing in them. Ugh. This evening we cleared out several boxes and organized some of the stuff we still haven't unpacked.

Jackson had a playdate with his friend Kate yesterday. He was less interested in sitting and playing with her than he was in running around into the neighbors yard. Oh well. Isn't her little strawberry swimsuit just so cute? Someday I will have my own little dress-up doll daughter, fingers crossed!

I've been working on the list. The Power of Attorney is put together and ready for us to sign and the will is almost done too (we just have to sit down and make our 'picks'). I put a call into the lawyer whose office was down the hall from when I worked with my dad and it literally took maybe five minutes. And he offered to do it at no cost. What a blessing! So I've crossed out two things on the list, but we've now decided to try to finish the basement before Derek leaves, too-- two steps forward, one (major) step back. At least it's progress!

Attitude Adjustment

Today I woke up with a bad attitude. The alarm clock went off at 6:30 on a Saturday. Our Sunday School class was headed out to serve breakfast for the homeless in downtown Kansas City and things just weren't going as planned- most of the kids had to cancel due to last minute game schedules, my original plans for my mom to watch Jackson weren't going to work out, and then to top it off Derek and Jackson were sick.

But I got out of bed, loaded up the hundreds of socks our church donated, and headed out to meet the crew. With a little help from a nutritious QT breakfast (a taquito and Coke) I perked up. And I had a great time and had so much fun. Isn't it amazing how that happens? I almost think I was blessed more than those getting food to fill their hungry tummies. Who am I to be so selfish as to wish to say in my comfy bed instead of reaching out to those in my very own community who have to comfy bed to crawl into each night?!?

Each and every time our Sunday school class goes out to serve, I am so proud. And in fact, I think these kids have a lot to teach me at times too. Ever since we got this activity put on the calendar, these kids were so excited about serving-- even when they had to get up earlier than on a school day! The kids all worked with good attitude at their stations and better yet, they had fun and are anxious to go back! The heart of a child is something to strive for and I am so grateful that I am able to be involved with these 4-5th graders to constantly remind me of this!

We served with Hope Faith Ministries this morning. There are some amazing things happening through this ministry for sure. Not only do they feed hundreds of people daily, their programs help equip their clients to move passed the rough patch they've encountered- offering jobs and a place to live for the few that they can so that they will become self sufficient, while a new person will have to chance to do the same. The ministry is privately funded through area churches and individuals and received no federal funding, which allows them the freedom to proclaim the gospel often. We only spent a few short hours and it was so easy to do. We were met with great appreciation, respect, and many smiles. Check it out to see what you can do!

On the drive up, the kids folded socks and tucked a little note in each pair:

May the food that we've served fill your belly and the socks warm your feet. More importantly, we pray that you know the Lord Jesus loves and cares for you very deeply. Heartland Baptist Church- Belton, MO. Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

Look at these smiles- 7am on a Saturday!

Kaitlyn slices bagels donated from Panera

Katie, Alyssa, Carla, Skylar, and Michelle
serving juice, milk, oatmeal, and bagels respectively

Dalton and Daniel prepare small cups of pineapple

Jorden, Kaylinn, and Ashley with the
coffee and dounuts

Yvonne and I are making pancakes
(hers were way better than mine!)

Katie and Andrea on the assembly line
getting plates ready